Thursday, January 7, 2010

"Snowmageddon" 2010

It's snowing in the North Georgia mountains.

This is not a big thing to me.  Having survived numerous hurricanes during my time in Florida, and being from this area originally, snow is...well, interesting.  For any number of reasons.

Remember, there are two distinct groups of people in these mountains:  the been-heres and the come-heres.  The been-heres pretty much know how, and when, to drive in the snow.  The come-heres, on the other hand, are very--very--unpredictable.

(As I wrote this, Tater, a guy from our detail shop, called in to say he'd driven into a ditch.  When I asked him where, he replied, "You know."  I don't.  Someone's gone to pull him out.  He's a been-here, so there goes that theory.)

A young lady came into the dealership yesterday afternoon (she's the one I stole who used "snowmageddon" originally) with a dire warning:  stay away from Kroger, for at least two reasons:  A)  it was Senior Adult day and 2)  snow was in the forecast.

Senior Adult "days" always amaze me.  First of all, the prerequisite age for a "senior adult" varies from place to place.  Buying a residence in an "Adult Community"?  Most of them are "55 and Older".  This looms large on the Randy Horizon, since I am closing in on that age.

Go to IHOP and try to get a Senior Adult Discount?  65+.  I don't know if I can wait that long.  Guess I'll stick with Waffle House, where what you pay is what you pay,  no matter how old or young you are or aren't.  But I digress.

Kroger on Senior Adult Day is like a nursing home on crack.  Older Georgians are there by the busload, some alone, some couples, some lost.  Staples fly off the shelves, all at a discount because you're old enough to qualify and young enough to pay.  Combine that with all the panicked mamas stocking up on milk and bread for the coming blizzard, and you have a recipe for disaster.

Why are bread and milk so important?  How about wine and cheese?  Or Cokes and brownies?  I can see it now:  it's snowing outside, and you're cuddling by the fire with your sweetheart.  You turn to her, look longingly in her eyes, and lovingly say, "Baby, hand me another slice of bread.  And get me some more milk."

All this mayhem and foolishness, for what forecasters predict will be about seven hours of snow, maybe one to two inches in the mountains.

I have milk.  And bread.  And snow.  I am not going to Kroger.

My Christmas tree is still up for the Big Game tonight (ROLL TIDE!).

It's a White Christmas.  In January.

No comments: